Clark County School District's menu is newsworthy

An 1,100-word article in today's Review Journal tells us school lunches are becoming, hipper, smarter, sexier.

Many parents are worried that the recent poor test scores reported by the school district have a direct correlation to the blandness of the food served in CCSD cafeterias. Never fear, the school district is making en effort to step up its culinary game in the coming school year.

"Well, I hate my job, and lunch is the highlight my my day. If I know my lunch is going to suck, like if my wife packs me a bologna sandwich, I can't get any work done. It's probably the same for my kids." Says William Dodongo, in response to the article.

The hard hitting expose cites experts like Dustin Lewandowski, chef and the grandson of a retired high school lunch lady, and Chynna Rodriguez, a child prodigy in the food critic industry. Rodriguez is only 17, but has a sensitive palate and a discriminating eye. She's rather harsh on the School District's current selections, claiming their food, "looks like somebody dug it out of the garbage."

But not everybody is happy with the change. Some more traditional parents say that bad cafeteria food is a staple of the American Education system. Detractors reminisce of classic musical pieces, like Lunch Lady Land, by Adam Sandler and Pizza Day, by LDS Punk sensations, the Aquabats.

"[expletive deleted] it, if stale chicken nuggets and taco boats were good enough for me, then they're good enough for my kids. You think I want those little [expletive deleted] coming home asking why we aren't having t-bones for dinner every night?" Says Dr. Albert Gannon

No matter which side of the argument you're on, the article should be praised for its enlightening nature. After all, if answers the age old question, "What exactly is a bagel dog?" Fans have been clamouring for the answer since the invention of the delectable lunch-time treat, and the RJ finally delivers, telling us they are, "hot dogs baked in bagel dough".

Amazing.