That's racist. No, that's progress.

It seems the school district has fallen short of the expectations set forth by the No Child Left Behind Act, the bane of most competent school district employees. If you don't know any teachers, do yourself a favor. Find one. Take him or her out to lunch and ask her to explain it to you. You'll be in for an hour-long roller coaster. Trust me.

According to an article in today's Sun, the school district stood up to the, sometimes unreasonable, guidelines of The Act for the past two years. Looks like this year, we didn't do so hot. I'm sure someone, somewhere will link it to the economy or an underfunded school district, but let me focus your attention a little.

According to the same article, federal education law dictates schools will be evaluated based on the performance of subgroups of students. Subgroups meaning, whether or not they're in Special Ed., their English fluency, their family income and, of course, their ethnicity.

Reading that makes me salivate. You're telling me, the government mandates that we record the difference between little black kids and little white kids? Really? Cause when I was growing up I was taught to ignore the color of someone's skin, and told that there wasn't any difference between me and my friends who weren't white.

You know, differences between races are only going to be there as long as we acknowledge them.

The following lines only get better. If the school district fails to get up to scratch, they're put on a "watch list" (their term, not mine). And after two consecutive years of inadequacy, the district in question incurs penalties, the most severe of which are a takeover by the state, and then federal government.

Yes, if your schools can't cut the muster, you may be facing the eventuality of sending your special little boy or girl to a school run by the federal government, where learning is fun, because if you say it isn't, they take away your chocorat for the week.

That's about the scariest future ever proposed to me. But, that in itself might be a thoughtcrime.

In any case, have a doubleplusgood day.